Spelling Bee Faces

(To the tune of Bon Jovi’s You Give Love a Bad Name): Zombies Attack and You’re to Blame/You Give Bath Salts a Bad Name/We Grow Apart and I Eat Your Face/You Give Bath Salts a Bad Name

I’ve spent the last two days at the beach and I’m having a great time. The best part? I haven’t had to answer any calls from my grandparents to help them with their new Android smartphones. After spending a few hours outside today, I returned to the condo and checked my voicemail. I had a message from my grandfather.

He said that he was thinking about trading in his Android for an iPhone and sought my advice on the matter. A lot of things ran through my head at that moment. First, why the sudden interest in the iPhone? Second, who’s trying to convince you to do it? Third, see the first and second questions. I can almost guarantee you that he met someone in the airport while traveling this week who was extolling the virtues of the iPhone. When I ask him, we’ll see just how close I am. I called him back but had to settle for leaving a voicemail. My response: if you get an iPhone, I won’t be able to help you if you have problems with it. I can’t wait to hear his response.

I apologize to anyone who found this to be an average (or possibly subpar) blog entry. Even I’m not entirely thrilled with it, but you have to blog when creativity strikes.

Wednesday June 20, 2012

My grandfather called me Wednesday morning with the not-so surprising news that he and my grandmother were having problems with their smartphones. He called while I was sleeping and I listened to the voicemail before I brewed my morning coffee. That was a mistake. Always have coffee (or tea, or whatever swill you enjoy) before you tackle anything in the morning. I’m serious about that. My grandfather tells me that he cannot hear his phone ring because it was set on vibrate, while my grandmother’s phone magically found itself in airplane mode. Ugh.

I explained the process by which he could switch his phone from vibrate to ring. The explanation took all of thirty seconds. The actual process of switching took significantly longer. My advice: Look on the side of your phone, there should be one or two buttons with an “up and down” function; push the “up” button until the ringer is correctly set. I then guided him through the step-by-step process of switching his wife’s phone from airplane mode so that she could make and receive phone calls. “Touch the button; don’t press on it,” I said many times during the conversation. Once that was settled, the order went something like this: Preferences-Settings-Wireless and Networking-Airplane Mode-Uncheck Airplane Mode. Five minutes later…success! “You know the process by which you just turned off airplane mode?” I asked. “Well, that’s the only way to possibly turn on airplane mode. It doesn’t just happen by itself.” For once, he was seemingly at a loss for words in trying to convince me that no one had turned on airplane mode.

He joked that payment for my help was in the mail, and I responded that if he was talking to a lawyer, he’d have been charged for the hour. What will Thursday bring in the continuing saga of teaching my grandparents how to use their smartphones? Stay tuned.

Tuesday June 19, 2012

The phone calls began today. Why didn’t I delete my cell phone number from their contact lists when I had the chance? The best ideas always come to you when it’s too late to do anything about it. He has questions about the icons (he did not use this term) at the top of the screen. I went online and pulled up a picture of his phone, since I did not have it in front of me. I explained the various icons (GPS, Ringtone, 4G icon, signal strength, battery strength, clock, etc.). I explained how to read the various icons and assured him that he had nothing to worry about. Little did I know, but this request for help would only be the tip of the iceberg.